a message to minor/adult shippers:
can you imagine if jurassic world really leaned into the fact that they’re splicing all sorts of animals together to make fake dinosaurs and all the designs weren’t just Large Angry Reptile
my ideal jurassic park is one where all the dinosaurs in the public park are beautiful and docile, but they’re secretly keeping hundreds of unethical ‘failure dinosaurs’ in testing somewhere, all of which are too violent or ugly to show. They’ve got pterosaurs with bioluminescent mouths and brontosaurs with horse legs and hundreds of other weird or grotesque and generally badly bred animals. The worst is a little collection of little potbellied hairless raptors with human hands and teeth because they tried to make some really smart, highly trainable dinosaurs, but in the end all they’ve made is ones that can hold a grudge.
number 18 has escaped the facility…
y’all: the men haven’t even made an effort, may as well have just gone to rent a tux
the black men: i beg u excuse me
Let’s not forget the king, himself in this.
They do this every year at every awards show. By now, y’all know damn well when they say “men” they mean “white men”.
Chadwick always standing like he about to graduate kindergarten
cat plant
This cat look like a drumstick
The similarities are far too real
It’s uncanny
@mostlycatsmostly someone made a gif omg
cat plant
This cat look like a drumstick
The similarities are far too real
It’s uncanny
@mostlycatsmostly someone made a gif omg
when people use “you messed with the wrong fandom” as a threat
It’s funnier because we all know there’s only one fandom that does that but if we mention it specifically, they’ll do just that. xD
we better keep this like SUPER LOCKED down we don’t know WHO could react to this one, EH? EH?
This is equivalent to a news station cutting to a technical maintenance screen just before someone dies
tumblr staff: we’re cracking down on that aDuLt CoNtEnT!
tumblr in practice: *more porn bots than ever follow me*
tumblr in practice: *my best albums of the year draft is flagged as adult content*
tumblr in practice: *your selfies from 2018 collection that weren’t flagged individually are flagged now*
jeb bush 2020 launching himself at ted cruz on the senate floor: you killed my father* prepare to die!**
*George H.W Bush (1924-2018) was killed by the Zodiac Killer on November 30th, 2018
**just a funny quote from a really good movie called the princess bride please go check it out at your local library
***there wasn’t a third astrix but I just wanted you all to know that I appreciate when you laugh at my really fun jokes and that I really work really hard. love you, no hard feelings!
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This post…..is…uhmm … sponsored?????
This post read like a fever dream
I hate linguistic anthropology. Why? One of the most influential experiments in linguistic anthropology involved teaching a chimp asl. One of the most influential linguistics is named Noam Chomsky. You know what the chimp’s name was?
Nim Chimpsky.
Fucking monkey pun.
And this is in textbooks, in documentaries, everywhere. And everyone just IGNORES THIS GOD AWFUL PUN cause of how important the experiment was. But
BUT LOOK AT THIS SHIT. FUCKING NIM CHIMPSKY. I HATE THIS WHOLE FIELD.
Its not just the linguistic anthropologists.
There’s a group of very important genes that determine if your body develops in the right shape/organization… they are called the hedgehog genes, because fruit fly geneticists are all ridiculous. The different hedgehog genes are all named after different hedgehogs. And then someone decided to get clever and name one “sonic hedgehog” because this is just what fruitfly geneticists do.
Well sonic hedgehog controls brain development, and now actual doctors are stuck in the position of explaining to grieving parents that their child’s lethal birth defects or life-threatening tumors are caused by a “sonic hedgehog mutation”.
And this is why no one will invite the fruit fly people to parties.
Biogeochemical scientists, upon discovering the complex mechanisms that govern the storage and use of molecular iron on our planet, decided to call this cycle “the ferrous wheel”. We groaned about that for at least five solid minutes.
The phenomenon of sneezing when exposed to sudden bright light is called an Autosomal-dominant Compelling Helio Opthalmic Outburst. ACHOO.
Half a byte of data is a nibble.
